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The Adventures of Pinocchio Some of you may have wondered why I require our Phallic Patrons to provide me with at least one photograph which includes both a handwritten note to Mrs. Candy and their erect Phallus. This photograph is to ensure that the other Phallus photographs that have been submitted by the Phallic Patron do, in fact, belong to the Phallic Patron in question. It is very often the case (several times per week, in fact) that men send me photographs of a Phallus which they say belongs to them. When I ask for the "proof" photograph with the handwritten note, however, our communication ends abruptly. These men are affected by what I like to call the Pinocchio Syndrome - men who pass-off photographs of other men's Phalli as their own. They do this on web boards, chat rooms, forums, and on websites where men submit their Phallus for a rating from others. Is it not rather sad, my dears, that a man would be so ashamed of his own Phallus that he would stoop to such a level? Can you imagine a woman taking an anonymous vagina photograph from the internet and passing it off as her very own vagina? I cannot, although it may indeed happen. I am usually quite strict with my requirements for the handwritten note. Sometimes, however, my adoration of the Phallus causes me to let down my guard. Take yesterday as an example. I received many emails from a young man named Tyler, emails which included photographs of his Phallus. And a beautiful Phallus it was. Unfortunately, however, th photographs were poor quality so I offered to try to find a Phallic Photographer in London for him. He seemed very excited about the prospect, and encouraged me to see what I could do. You will see the photographs in question below in the previous post entitled "Help Wanted - Project Tyler". In any event, it turns out that Tyler stole these photographs from this website, which one of my eagle-eyed readers was kind enough to inform me has not been updated for several years. Here are some of the Pinocchio fibs that Tyler felt he needed to tell Mrs. Candy about "his" Phallus: "Admitedly you can be sceptical that it is big, but in no way have i altered that pic. Attached is a pic of me measuring my penis, which will illustrate my size." "My veins are often very pronounced, and i like showing it that way. i think it is rather sexy." "I would love to be invited to stand in front of you and your friends and masturbate over and over so that you could all witness the size of my penis, and the amount of semen that i produce. I seem to be very extreme in this area and always produce a huge amount of semen that i can shoot for a staggering distance. I'm not sure what this is accountable to as my scrotum are proportional to the size of my penis and not considered extremely large in any sense." "Do you think you friends would be interested in viewing me? Additional pictures of me attached, for your appreciation. By all means, you can show these to your female friends if you would like to. If so, please ask them to drop me an email with their thoughts too." The poor thing. What would cause a man to weave such elaborate lies about his Phallus? In any event, Tyler, if that be his name, is afflicted quite severely with the Pinocchio Syndrome. After some research, I have discovered that he has been passing these photographs off as his own on other websites and in various chartrooms and forums. Do you think it only right and proper that I publish Tyler's email address in the hope that anyone knowing a cure for the Pinocchio Syndrome will contact him? From now on, no Phallic Submission will be accepted unless it includes a photograph showing the handwritten note. Here are some lovely examples of our past handwritten notes. Are they not simply delightful?

Tags: photograph, phallus, pinocchio, tyler, note

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By Kevin Guilfoile "Justice will not be found through the legal system...Would taking some of their money even be justice? Their lives would go on, just with a little less money. Our lives will never be the same." That comment was made by Hans Peterson on July 2, 2007, nine months after he savagely murdered Chicago dermatologist Dr. David Cornbleet. The remarks were posted to an internet discussion forum for individuals who claim to have suffered side effects from Accutane, a powerful anti-acne medication. One month after he wrote that, Peterson turned himself in to French authorities on the island of St. Martin. According to reports, he told police that he murdered Dr. Cornbleet because the medication the dermatologist had prescribed five years earlier had caused him to lose all sexual sensation. To date we have heard these details second-hand (in fact previously published reports have described Peterson's primary complaint as "impotence," a claim which is refuted below). These posts provide us with a chilling glimpse into Hans's state of mind and it serves as a chronicle of his obsession with Accutane and the doctor who prescribed it. Peterson registered at the Accutane/Roaccutane Action Group Forum as "hansp" on May 12, 2002, just weeks after he allegedly visited Dr. Cornbleet's office for the first time. (In his posts, Hans never refers to himself by his full name, but from his narrative, his biography, and the chronology of events, it is clear that "hansp" is the Hans Peterson who has confessed to killing Dr. Cornbleet.) On June 16 of that year he posted his first comment. "In late April, I went to see a dermatologist for my very mild, but persistent acne. He was an unethical old man who suggested accutane. He said that it was a very safe and popular drug with no serious side effects. I was never given a blood test. He never showed me the consent forms that he is required by law to make me sign. I was started on 80 mg per day. (I weigh around 190) He said that I could take the entire day's dose at once. When I picked up my prescription, the pharmacist conveniently forgot to give me the FDA required medication guide. When I picked up the medication, I was under the impression that accutane was an extremely safe drug. "I took it for 2 days. Then I got a bad headache and read about the side effects. I stopped right away. I thought that I was safe having only taken a few pills. However, about 5 days later, I got really depressed and couldn't sleep. My ears started to ring around this time, and a lot of hair around my hairline began to fall out. (The roots of these follicles were black, normally they're white.) My appetite went away around this time as well. A couple of days after this, my libido vanished and I lost virtually all sexual sensation...It has been over a month and a half since my very brief experience with accutane and most of these effects have not improved at all. (I sleep a little better as I am starting to get used to the ear ringing, but that is about it.) "Am I permanently affected from taking an acne medicine for 2 days?" More than 60 posts from Hans follow over the next five years. They show a man becoming increasingly obsessed with the drug Accutane and the effects he believed it was having on his body and his mind. He attributes a series of ailments, including depression, to the medication but the two that he claims most haunt him are a constant ringing in his ears and a loss of sexual sensation. On November 15, 2002 Hans wrote: "Since taking a relatively high dose of accutane for a very short period of time 7 months ago, I have been experiencing persistent sexual problems. I would describe it as a loss of libido and sexual sensation. I have lost virtually all interest in sex. When I do engage in sex or masturbation, the act is no longer pleasurable. I can get an erection and otherwise function normally. The pleasurable sensation is just gone." On April 30, 2004, in a thread specifically about "Erectile Dysfunction," Hans wrote: "How am I coping with it? Not particularly well. You take a drug in order to increase your chances of getting laid, and end up not being able to enjoy getting laid. (Getting an erection isn't that big of a problem - it's the near complete loss of sensation.) I guess you could try to enjoy pleasing the other person, and all that crap. But, still, this side effect is horrible..." As the years pass, Hans tries to become more familiar with both the science and the unsubstantiated claims made about Accutane. He consults with other doctors, who are not able to prove a link between his ailments and the drug he took briefly years before. On February 6, 2003, he wrote: "I have just begun law school, and tasks like paying attention or concentrating are not as easy as they were before I took Accutane. Perhaps I can use whatever legal knowledge I gain to take my revenge... I have nothing else to live for." (The list of side-effects that members of this forum attribute to Accutane is so long that it would be difficult to find a response from drugmaker Roche for every single one. In the past Roche has denied a connection between Accutane and the most serious conditions alleged. "It's our conclusion, along with the outside experts and the FDA, that there is no scientific basis that links Accutane with depression or suicide," a spokesperson told Reuters in 2002.) In a few of these posts, Hans seems to be formulating his rationalization for murder. According to Hans, Dr. Cornbleet is a villain who "deceived" him by knowingly prescribing a dangerous drug without providing any warning of the harmful effects associated with it. Hans also suggests a possible motive for this: Greed. On October 9, 2002 Hans speculated that Dr. Cornbleet was "desperate for patients, and, if I were to go on accutane, I would have to see him every two weeks for a check up." These two claims would seem to be inconsistent, however. Presumably Dr. Cornbleet did not tell Hans that Accutane was an "extremely safe" and "popular drug with no serious side effects" that nevertheless required an intense schedule of bi-monthly monitoring visits. And yet, especially compared to the standards of internet discussion forums, Peterson's writing is frequently clear and concise. At times he even grows impatient with his fellow posters, chastising them for throwing out statistics and claims without citations: "Is there anyone that can tell me where this information is actually published ? I admire the effort of the people that run this site, but you should really provide some adequate form of citation, so we know that these figures aren't just pulled out of the air...I don't doubt the truth of these statements, but in order for this website to be taken seriously, there needs to be some way of verifying the claims that are made on it." After a period of frequent activity in the spring and summer of 2004, Hans disappears from the forum for two years, returning on September 20, 2006, just four weeks before he would travel from New York to Chicago to murder Dr. Cornbleet. On that day he posts two links--one to a depression study reported on the BBC web site and another to a video on YouTube. On October 10, he posts the complete text of an article about Dopamine. The next post is February 7, 2007, more than three months after the murder: "I was deceived by my doctor almost 5 years ago into taking this drug (no consent form, no med guide, no warnings whatsoever). I took a rather high dose for two days. TWO DAYS!!! (albeit an 80 mg undivided dose) Life altering, presumably neurological, problems which I never experienced before have plagued me ever since. "I will never know again what it is like to pleasure a woman because I no longer have any sexual sensation - I will never again experience what silence is due to the constant ringing in my ears - I will never know who I would have become because of what this motherf**king drug has done to my mind. A drug which I should have never been prescribed...In at least some cases, such as mine, this drug just does its damage when its taken, or shortly thereafter, and that's it. No real hope of recovery, doctors are useless, the damage is done. "Doubt my problems and their connection to Accutane all you want - I know I wouldn't believe a word of it if I had never taken the drug and someone told me the story I have told above. The truth is, I'm a rational non-hypochondriac who still can't believe how his life has been changed by this drug." He posted four more times before he turned himself in to St. Martin police in August. On July 2, his second-to-last post he wrote: "Justice will not be found through the legal system. There is no way to objectively verify Accutane-induced permanent neurological problems. Even if there were, it would be near impossible to legally prove causation. Even then, statutes of limitation would have run... If and when the **** ever does hit the fan they will just point out how strenuously they claimed their ignorance about permanent problems. "Would legal justice even be justice, anyway? The people who have profitted from Roche's deception won't be personally brought to justice -- they will be shielded from personal liability... Roche's stock might drop, that's about it, it still would have been rational for those ***holes to deceive regarding Accutane in the first place: its profits over the years have been more than enough. The corrupt FDA, as a gov't institution, can't be held liable.... "There is no foreseeable retributive action in the legal system which would make their fraud regarding Accutane a mistake. Their decisions were economically rational and they know it. Would taking some of their money even be justice? Their lives would go on, just with a little less money. Our lives will never be the same. "If you seek real justice, it will not come through the legal system -- they know this, that's why they continue to deceive and play ignorant. It is the financially rational thing to do..." Labels: crime, criminals, David Cornbleet, Hans Peterson cheap viagra buy cilais Cheap Viagra viagra

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A lot of people, it seems, are tired of "phony sex." Conventional porn features a lot of fakery: fake boobs, fake acting, fake orgasms, etc. Apparently, there is a lurking market out there for sex realism: At first glance, abbywinters.com (NSFW) might look like just another "barely legal" porn site, and Kink.com (NSFW) like yet another fetish studio. Websites in Kink's network explore themes ranging from dominance and submission (NSFW) to sex machines (NSFW), while Australian "amateurs" site abbywinters showcases the first blush of young womanhood in all its natural beauty -- no makeup, no boob jobs and no men....Abbywinters offers the one-on-one feel of a cam site, the production values of a high-definition digital studio and the genuine sexual energy of good amateur video. While not accepting user-generated content, the team encourages input from site visitors. Fans can post a suggestion in the forums and find themselves discussing it with a director within hours. The shoot might even begin the next day. Staffers develop a scenario for each shoot, but let the sexual energy build organically. The performers decide what to do and when to do it. It's not uncommon for abbywinters girls to go for an hour or two, and for the entire thing -- bonked heads, arousal ebbs and flows, hiccups and all -- to end up on a DVD.... I've described the modern porn consumer as "savvy" and "sophisticated," but I could just as accurately have said "jaded" and "unimpressed." Kink and abbywinters succeed in this environment because they recognize that they must provide more than pornographic pictures to get our interest, much less keep it. By treating customers as collaborators, they manage to create an experience and make the fantasy real -- and they do that by bringing authentic sex to the virtual realm of porn. Wired So they keep the farts and everything? Oh, I forgot--no online smell interfaces yet. Still, striving for reality has to be an improvement on the phoniness of most porn. Parenthetically, if children are going to be introduced to sex on the internet--inadvertently, while researching school assignments and such--isn't it better for them to see the real thing, rather than staged and faked? I think so. Labels: online sex Cheap Viagra generic cialis Generic Viagra cialis

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