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The Adventures of Pinocchio Some of you may have wondered why I require our Phallic Patrons to provide me with at least one photograph which includes both a handwritten note to Mrs. Candy and their erect Phallus. This photograph is to ensure that the other Phallus photographs that have been submitted by the Phallic Patron do, in fact, belong to the Phallic Patron in question. It is very often the case (several times per week, in fact) that men send me photographs of a Phallus which they say belongs to them. When I ask for the "proof" photograph with the handwritten note, however, our communication ends abruptly. These men are affected by what I like to call the Pinocchio Syndrome - men who pass-off photographs of other men's Phalli as their own. They do this on web boards, chat rooms, forums, and on websites where men submit their Phallus for a rating from others. Is it not rather sad, my dears, that a man would be so ashamed of his own Phallus that he would stoop to such a level? Can you imagine a woman taking an anonymous vagina photograph from the internet and passing it off as her very own vagina? I cannot, although it may indeed happen. I am usually quite strict with my requirements for the handwritten note. Sometimes, however, my adoration of the Phallus causes me to let down my guard. Take yesterday as an example. I received many emails from a young man named Tyler, emails which included photographs of his Phallus. And a beautiful Phallus it was. Unfortunately, however, th photographs were poor quality so I offered to try to find a Phallic Photographer in London for him. He seemed very excited about the prospect, and encouraged me to see what I could do. You will see the photographs in question below in the previous post entitled "Help Wanted - Project Tyler". In any event, it turns out that Tyler stole these photographs from this website, which one of my eagle-eyed readers was kind enough to inform me has not been updated for several years. Here are some of the Pinocchio fibs that Tyler felt he needed to tell Mrs. Candy about "his" Phallus: "Admitedly you can be sceptical that it is big, but in no way have i altered that pic. Attached is a pic of me measuring my penis, which will illustrate my size." "My veins are often very pronounced, and i like showing it that way. i think it is rather sexy." "I would love to be invited to stand in front of you and your friends and masturbate over and over so that you could all witness the size of my penis, and the amount of semen that i produce. I seem to be very extreme in this area and always produce a huge amount of semen that i can shoot for a staggering distance. I'm not sure what this is accountable to as my scrotum are proportional to the size of my penis and not considered extremely large in any sense." "Do you think you friends would be interested in viewing me? Additional pictures of me attached, for your appreciation. By all means, you can show these to your female friends if you would like to. If so, please ask them to drop me an email with their thoughts too." The poor thing. What would cause a man to weave such elaborate lies about his Phallus? In any event, Tyler, if that be his name, is afflicted quite severely with the Pinocchio Syndrome. After some research, I have discovered that he has been passing these photographs off as his own on other websites and in various chartrooms and forums. Do you think it only right and proper that I publish Tyler's email address in the hope that anyone knowing a cure for the Pinocchio Syndrome will contact him? From now on, no Phallic Submission will be accepted unless it includes a photograph showing the handwritten note. Here are some lovely examples of our past handwritten notes. Are they not simply delightful?

Tags: photograph, phallus, pinocchio, tyler, note

I have often spoken of the Seed Harvest. This ancient ritual involves a man masturbating for the viewing pleasure of others and allowing the viewers to participate in the most intimate of moments; that divine moment when the seed of life spurts forth from the Phallus. Those who witness the Seed Harvest are invigorated with the positive energy of the harvest. Watch the video below and feel the Phallic energy flow through your body. If you are able, you may wish to turn the volume up on this video. The groans of ecstasy made by a man at the moment he harvests his seed are no less beautiful than the 4th Movement ( Andante maestoso-Allegro Vivace) of Tchaikovsky's Symphony No. 5 in E minor op. 64. In fact, for added beauty, may I suggest that you first start listening to the Tchaikovsky and then, and only then, click on the video and listen to both of them together. See, my dears! Tchaikovsky and a Seed Harvest compliment each other so very nicely. Oh, I do adore it beyond description! I will be creating a new section on this website called Seed Harvest Videos. I encourage people to submit videos of their own Seed Harvest for Mrs. candy and her readers. Please make sure your video commences with you holding a written note that says "A Seed Harvest for Mrs. Candy". All Seed Harvest Video submissions will be posted . Please remember to also include your name, your age and your location. I am very much looking forward to receiving videos in this new and exciting category. Let the Seed Harvest begin! Generic Viagra cialis buy cheap cialis cheap viagra

Tags: harvest, seed, video, tchaikovsky, moment

I have often written of that rare breed of man who is able to use his mouth and tongue to masturbate his own Phallus. I speak, of course, of the Auto Fellator. So fascinated am I with this subject, I have created Mrs. Candy's Auto Fellatio Club. So far, as you may recall, we have four members. We are about to add a fifth. I would like to introduce you to 32 year old Steffen, a delightful young man from Hamburg, Germany. Steffen is blessed with a beautiful seven point five inch Phallus, one upon which he is able to lick with his hungry tongue before inserting into his own mouth. A very talented young man is Steffen, and I am sure the envy of many. Mrs. Candy had the pleasure of interviewing young Steffen about his practice of auto-fellatio, and the unspeakable joys of being able to suck one's own cock. Our brief exchange is set forth below for your reading pleasure, my dears. Mrs. Candy: When was the first time that sucked your own Phallus? Steffen: Actually, only about 2 or 3 months ago. It's pretty new to me, although I had heard of it before. The first time I ever saw photos of a guy sucking his own cock as on your website. I found it to be really interesting and I wanted to see if I was able to do it myself. Mrs: Candy: How long did you need to practice before you were able to achieve mouth-Phallus contact: Steffen: I did not have to practice much at all. All of these photos were taken on my second and third try. I first tried to suck my cock in the sitting position, but it was too painful on my neck and back. I then tried laying on my back and pulling my legs over my head. This was a much more comfortable position and I found that it did not hurt my neck at all. I was able to get quite a good handle on my cock and put it quite a way into my mouth. Mrs. Candy: How does it feel to have your own Phallus in your mouth? Does it feel different to someone else sucking your Phallus? Steffen: In a word, fantastic! Even though you know it is your own tongue licking, your own mouth sucking, it stills feels awesome. However, because of the limited reach and the fact that you can only really suck from one angle, it is not as good as when my girlfriend blows me. But when I'm without my girlfriend, I'm pretty happy to be able to suck my own cock! Mrs. Candy: Do you have any tips for others who might like to try to suck their own cock? Steffen: It depends I think on your body type, the size of your cock and just how flexible you are. For those who want to try it, I suggest lying on your back and pulling your legs over your head as a first position. Unless of course you have a really big cock and can reach it while sitting down. If you can do that, go for it! Mrs. Candy: Have you ever sucked your Phallus to orgasm? Did you eat your own sperm? What was it like? Steffen: I did not actually suck myself to orgasm. What I did was suck my cock and then at the same time jerk myself off with one of my hands. So I blew myself and gave myself a hand job at the same time. I was really horny that day and actually blew a load into my mouth. I'm not really that into the taste of my own cum, but it wasn't bad at all. If I don't blow in my mouth, I usually come all over my face instead. Gets a bit messy, though! Mrs. Candy: How often do you fellate yourself, my dear? One a week? Once a month? Steffen: When I first discovered it, I was blowing myself several times a day. I did that for about a month. Then I got a girlfriend who now does a better job at it than me. I haven't done it for a while, but hearing all of your questions, Mrs. Candy, is turning me on. I might just have to go and blow myself right now!! Mrs. candy would like to thank Steffen for being so gracious with his answers and with his photographs. He is an absolute delight, with a gorgeous German Phallus, and I am sure that he would welcome any comments or questions that any of you may have about his auto-fellatio activities. If you would like to contact Steffen, you may do so by sending him an email. Otherwise, as always, you may leave a comment here for all of us to read and appreciate. generic cialis buy cheap cialis generic viagra online cheap viagra

Tags: steffen, candy, mrs, cock, phallus

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